The Thing About...


...A hot desking working environment is that I never know who ends up sitting next to me at work. Take today for instance. I'm seated next to someone that does nothing but surfs the net for clothes to buy, plays cake factory (some flash game) and looks at other people's friendster account.

Oh I just love my job.

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On Mas Selamat

I can't say that I'm happy with the verdict of a national scandal of such unprecedented magnitude and public outrage. C'mon people. A limping Islamist extremist suspect does a Michael Scofield on WRDC, sets up the potential for a future terrorist attacks, makes a laughing-stock of my country, and all our government does is punish nine individuals? (many of which are junior in rank).

Know whats really sad? That this isn't going to change the attitudes of people in the security scene (or rather, in government service) in the long run. I mean hey, remember the incident where this kid booked out with a SAR 21 to go shopping at Heeren? Different scenario, same deal. Ten years down the road, you'll still find men sleeping during guard duty, white-collar clock watchers waiting for the bell to ring, and uncles hoping to spend their remaining days in service with a government that gives out fat pensions.

I can turn a blind eye to the cockiness at the top, the bad investment decisions and the admin lapses that are ever so frequently associated with the people working under this shelter. But Mas Selamat escaping - this I cannot forget.

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The 100th post


You know how people always say that a picture is worth a thousand words? I can do better. This 100th post features a youtube video starring me as the story's protagonist. (bluff you. It's actually another rant.)

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XD your head - part II


Paul: Why is the accounting profession dominated by females?
Me: Only at the lower levels ya? One sees more males as they move up the ladder.
GS: That's because females like to look at figures, and males like to look at their figures! XD!

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GS: Who's better? Sun Wukong or Batman?

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Paul: How come people worship Sun Wukong, but nobody worships Zhu Ba Jie or Sha Wu Jing?
GS: Would you rather worship a top-tier god or a second/third tier god?
(C'mon, you saw that one coming).

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(On taking our orders)
Blur Uncle: Ai lim simi?
Me: Teh-O bing
Paul: yuan-yang si.
Blur Uncle: Simi?
Paul: Yuan-yang SI!
Blur Uncle: Lim Simi?
Paul:...Teh-O Gosong.

Blur uncle: (pointing to me) Le ai lim dao ni ah? (Soybean milk)

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Paul: In comparing who's better, we must examine the internal logic of the universe in which that character resides in.
GS: But Batman has the (utility) belt! XD

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(While I was quoting to the guys about what Miss X told me about not having a boyfriend)

me: Why don't you have one?
me (quoting miss X): Heard alot of stories from my cousin about her husband/ex-boyfriends beating and ill-treating her. I'm terrified.
Paul: eh, got ask her if she looks like her cousin or not?

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Good night(.)

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Wazzat sticking out of your back man?


You all have probably heard how I almost got set up at work, how fed up I was, and how f***ed up a certain somebody is. Well, here's the sequel.

Miss X was given (by yours truly) the heavy responsibility of obtaining a certain bank facilities agreement from the client. Such a daunting (sic) task typically involves, through a keen sense of observation, one to discern the following:-


1) Recognising which party issued the letter.
Through a series of inspections and an acute sense of smell, Miss X will pick out the relevant agreement by looking at the letterhead of the contract.

2) If the minute details within the bank facilities letter are consistent with the workings on our prior year working papers. Say, if our working papers say the loan period starts from 1st Jan, Miss X will then scrutinise, peruse and inspect the cheem loan agreement for that one golden line which says "Date of inception...1st Jan 20xx-31 Dec 20xx".

3) Agreeing the details to our current year working papers.
Transposing the details from the agreement to our working papers via the most complex computer program ever created in the history of mankind. Microsoft Excel.

4) Making a duplicate copy of the said agreement.
Her job requires her to operate a (gasp!!!) copier.

Sarcastic jokes aside, Miss X didn't know what loan agreement to copy because of the mere fact that there had been a minor typo in our prior year audit working papers as depicted below:-

Bank name: UOB (say)
Amount borrowed: 3.5m <--This figure read 3.3m in our prior year audit working papers
repayment period -1 Jan 1900- 31 Dec 2000
monthly repayment: $30,000
Date of inception dd/mm/yyyy
name of other party: Mr. Tan Ah Kow
etc etc

Having IDed a potential typo and not knowing what to do with it, she had me come over and verbally acknowledge that this was the document I wanted to be filed in.
.....
It gets better. When I finally get around to asking her why she would want to do a thing like that, the reply I get is "Because u ask me to get one, so I must make sure this is the correct one."

The pinnacle of covering backside. The epitome of kiasee-ness.
Wah lau.

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Prison Break Season 3!!!

Picking up where the last season finale left off, Michael now finds himself smack in the middle of scumville (oh the irony). The prison of Sona is such a wretched place of villainy - the law has cleared out and the inmates are left to run the prison themselves. As a result, differences are resolved by throwing chicken feet at each other, and brawling to the death.

And then there's Lechero, the new bad guy in town. Michael, being the superstar that he is on CNN, soon attracts the attention of the powerful drug kingpin that runs the place. And Michael soon finds himself set up for a chicken feet brawl in the short 24 hours that he's spent in Sona. That, and the fact he's trapped in this hellhole with three of his most favourite people in the world make this an excellent season opener.

And then, when the episode is over, I scream at my screen, "GAME ON, GAME MOTHERF****NG ON!!!" Because seriously, what a great set up for the season. Except if you're Michael, that is.

Lechero offering Mahone a chicken foot

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Looking Back.



No whys. Just felt like posting a pic.

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